Just bend the pieces till they fit.

Sentimental friends

On the floor the people dance around
Moving close together, but there all alone in the corner
There's the girl I once knew, who broke me in two

So won't you please play a song, a sentimental song
For my sentimental friend over there
We've been so long apart, make it go right to the heart
Of my sentimental friend over there
Bring the tears to her eyes, help to make her realise
The love we had was just beyond compare
Then if the time is right, maybe I'll hold her tight
My sentimental friend over there-ere

I recall the way she used to feel, when we heard a sad song
The teardrops would flow and she'd hold me
And tell me she'd be, forever with me

So won't you please play a song, a sentimental song
For my sentimental friend over there
We've been so long apart, make it go right to the heart
Of my sentimental friend over there
Bring the tears to her eyes, help to make her realise
The love we had was just beyond compare
Then if the time is right, maybe I'll hold her tight
My sentimental friend over there

Oh won't you please play a song, a sentimental song
For my sentimental friend over there
We've been so long apart, make it go right to the heart
Of my sentimental friend over there
Bring the tears to her eyes, help to make her realise
The love we had was just beyond compare
Then if the time is right, maybe I'll hold her tight
My sentimental friend over there-ere

Oh won't you please play a song, a sentimental song
For my sentimental friend over there (fade)

was reading through some econs drqs in the 06' past papers, and one line caught my attention out of the whole lot of words: "If the plan is competently implemented, HIV positive parents should survive long enough to put their children through school."

the 'should' makes all the difference in a bleak outlook.

How did we all stay together these years? i believe in miracles, this is one of them.

when there is lack of communicacion.

as the holidays float by hazily just before drawing to an abrupt close as we crash back to the reality called school (bit unfortunate, aint it?), the lack of going out the house almost daily has led to the running out of topics to blog about. as such, partly because i realised that my blog contains far too few pictures as compared to most other blogs i have randomly come across through pressing the button at the top of the page, i have decided to add in more pics to my blog. predictably, the pictures centre around plants, since i have been taking mostly plant pictures ever since i changed camera. and as my camera is presently in thailand now, i cannot take any pictures.


nope, it is not deformed, modified by photoshop in anyway. and yes, it is a plant. pseudolithos they call it, meaning that it pretends to be a rock.



No idea what this is



Is this a flower to you?



One of those giant grasshoppers that just ignore you no matter how hard u prod them.



I know it looks totally wrong. imagine so many primary kids seeing that during the life science symposium. other than the point that it has turned from carnivorous to cannibalistic, the other point about anatomy needs no further mention.



An inflorescence you don't get to see often, especially if it is almost not in cultivation and not named yet. contrary to other members of the same genus, this one has a sweet smell.

as the last week of the june 'holidays' continues even as i continue typing here, my mind remains a blur. i know full well why i am staring at notes and books hours each day, but i do not have a clue as to what the final destination is. maybe i do, maybe i dont, but we are just supposed to focus on the process i guess? watched pushing daisies on channel 5 (knowing that whoever reads this must be thinking i have way too much time). i admit i had no idea why was the series named pushing daisies, but know i do. pushing up the daisies from where one lies 6 feet under, nice way of phrasing it.

maybe a death-centric show appeals to my senses at this point in time,but i am just receptive to this show, for now. life in death rather than death in life.

time hangs still, even as it gallops past.

Had to make a trip down to the PC show yesterday to get a new printer to replace the old one. interesting experience walking rows and rows and encountering numerous people who kept offering you pamphlets for various products. after buying the printer, found out the box was 2ft by 2ft by 2ft. essentially a very large cube, balanced on a little trolley provided, which meant that the centre of gravity was way off, making pulling it around a challenge. people were staring at the big box i was carrying, but then again, i did not really care. perhaps they did have a reason to stare, with all the threats of boxes containing dangerous content etc.

even as study progresses forward in this.... holiday, i cant help but wonder which uni i would like to get into. Course descriptions are always too brief, and of course merely descriptions, unable to convey the lesson structure and content. Borrowing from the line of "everything and everyone has their place and purpose", i am still trying to find a niche. my only hope is that i never get bored in my job, which is immensely difficult if the job entails the same thing day in day out. i guess one can get used to anything, given enough time, even killing as with soldiers used to war.

My brother, barely back from poland for less than a week, has declared that he is going to pattaya the following week. Just rubbing it in, just rubbing it in.... the caged existence. from my point of view, who needs space when there is a whole world to explore out there. so many places to visit,so many civilisations to marvel at, and so much land to travel upon. Travel as a means to extend our view scope of the world, as a process, but not as a destination.

a random thought: life is like a game of chuzzle(refer to popcap.com). destroying cute furballs in the name of fun, collecting their eyes in a conical flask in the name of sadism, advancing through the game by breaking through locks that entrap. sometimes there are too many locks to pick through, resulting in losing the game through the lack of possible moves. and most of all, there is a hint button. why am i even typing this out for others to read through tediously? simply 'cos i was randomly playing abit of it .

is it just me or has life gotten a tad more boring than usual? perhaps it is just me getting down to revision, but life just drags on these days, as the CTs loom nearer and ever nearer. boredom has even driven me to blog on a more frequent basis.

living a life of contradictions. an example being my yearn for being alone at times, but yet i wish for company as well. To study, i want total silence and to be alone, but when i come online after a day's work there is no one to talk to...

does fate determine our actions, or do our actions determine our fate?

for now, all other thoughts and desires, yearns, are put on hold, as 'World War III Looms Near' (applicable only to those who have read paddy clarke hahaha)

BIG ENOUGH THIS TIME? lol.

today went out with the gang, for the last time in what would be a long while, probably a month or more. went to watch narnia, which was long enough to get draggy in middle and towards the abrupt end. from now on, mugging mode will be turned on fully, hopefully as i attempt to absorb as much information from various textbooks in as little time as possible. Bio, Econs, Chem, Math, English shall be my most likely order of study, even though that aint prioritizing at all. for those from IB who ever read this blog, which means almost everyone who reads this blog, please do remember not to neglect king lear, for if you do not constantly revise through king lear, facts learnt would soon be forgotten till it is too late.

tomorrow marks the 3rd week since it happened. how fast that period of time has gone by, as if it belonged to a different life altogether. maybe i did not blog much about it back then, because emotion would have clouded everything else out.

life and death are but the two sides of the same coin, contrasting but yet complementing one another. for without life, death would be a meaningless void, and without death, we would not appreciate life. maybe i have just been cheating everyone these past weeks, including myself, pretending that it was all ok. perhaps i was a little quieter than i usually was, trying to convince myself to move on, getting caught up with daily life, that which never ceases, laughing along with others though i hardly saw humour.

but at night, when life slows down, my mind can't help but drift towards the memories, and stare at the void which cannot be filled. i have accepted it, but yet i still cling on, wishing that things did not turn out as such. the pain is not acute, and not even numb like a toothache, it is simply just a hollowness. i tried to lead a normal life, by separating school life and life at home, tried to pretend it was all alright.

i teared once throughout the whole thing, perhaps because i was tearing on the inside for years anyway. Sorrow you can hold, however desolating, if nobody speaks to you. If they speak, you break down. ~Bede Jarrett. how true this seems.

'Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.' though the memories are few and far between, they are of inexplicable value.

If tears could build a stairway,
And memories a lane,
I'd walk right up to Heaven
And bring you home again.

nope, i don't mean the last line at all, for going is better than staying in this physical realm.